Miracles have been happening everywhere. I have noticed small but distinct things unfold right in front of me. Whether it's a conversation with someone who was previously unknown to me, or finding out something new "by chance", it's all been completely wonderful. I've also realised that these miracles have been there in front of me, all along. Thing is, I never noticed certain individuals, or absorbed the words I was putting out there through my blog, or to the universe in general. I was simply, in deep sleep. And now that I've finally opened my eyes, I'm finding that every day there's a small miracle that shows me how wonderful things actually are. It's in that moment of wholeness, do you realise how much you've been missing.
Since my last long post, I took a few days to really work on myself more than I had been. I pretty much cranked up everything I was doing, and delving in to the deep end with all my various issues. I saw those patterns of destruct within me, and I felt quite imbalanced. It was basically time to just renew myself. Almost like going to a spa. Coming out rejuvenated at the other end. Except this wasn't expensive, and I wasn't sharing the jacuzzi with some old ladies. This was my own spa. I built rooms of therapy, each room filled with "big things" that needed to be treated, for instance - my inability to be totally happy about something I love, due to feeling scared that it won't last. Some rooms had more than one big thing inside, whilst others had just one, very very large big thing. As I made my way through each room, I analysed where these issues had stemmed from. I thought of various therapies I could give myself - maybe a nice aromatherapy massage to calm down the nerves, or a green tea infused steam to settle the heated thoughts. No, that's not what I needed, for those are only temporary answers to a long term problem. I waited for a few moments, stood in the corridor of my spa and took a few breaths. The answer came almost instantly. Love. That's what I needed. I needed to use love to dissolve all the "big things" that have been building over the years.
Several days passed and I saw the substantial change in my thought patterns. I'm still not where I need to be, but the direction I am heading makes me feel positive to know that I am finally surrounding myself and growing in love. It's no longer tainted or dark. And that, feels so wonderful.
The funny thing is - we never actually understand how simple the solutions are to inner turmoil. We always think it's much bigger than we could fathom, much farther than we can climb to, and harder than we can bear. Just being open to this type of change can turn your world down upside within moments.
I know I harp on about love a lot - but there are so many types of love you can have in your life and that you can experience - it can take you places in an instant. It's one of the best feelings in the world, I think - when you finally let it all in completely. And I'm not only talking about love to yourself, but love that you share with another soul as well.
This year so far, has been one of the most loving, most cherishing and totally encapsulating year I have had the pleasure to witness in forever. I have a slight feeling that this is only the beginning. And what a thrilling thought that is!
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