Flight

New beginnings. That's what I'm all about. That's what I write about. That's what I wrote about when I yearned for them. And lately, I've been been witnessing them more than usual.. Not that I'm complaining.

I left my job. I finally did it! Although I wasn't as brave as I thought I could be.. And I resigned after finding another job, although in a similar field. It felt bittersweet as I rolled in to my last day a few days ago. It felt so new, and it was my first "last day at a job" so that was pretty great. Especially since I've hardly had "first time" events in the last few months, although I hope that is to change in the near future. 

I talk a lot about change, I know - but it's what I'm used to. It's what I know and what I am about. I have had many periods in my life where there has been no change, but constant turmoil, or just boredom. I have realised though, I can actually be pushed really far before I feel like I'm breaking (or falling apart.. Or falling together, depending on the situation). As time goes on, and more changes occur, I understand more about myself and I see how resilient I am. Yes, I have moments where I'd rather give up and pretend that certain issues don't exist, but on the whole - I feel like I've become more persistent in dealing with everything as and when it comes along. In short, I am never too surprised with what I have been faced with.. I realise how that comment can be both pessimistic and optimistic at the same time.

Over the last few months I have seen myself do and say things I thought I'd never have the confidence to do. Especially at work (although it spans over to my personal life as well). Things like speaking up when I felt something was going wrong or felt uncomfortable with to things like giving myself credit where it was due (not to be mistaken with pride).

As I have also involved myself with matrimonial searches - I have become more open-minded and far less reserved in talking about myself. It has helped in making me understand what I want in my future, and where I'd like to be.. And what type of person I'd like to be there with. It's exciting, for sure but it can get a little monotonous and a bit confusing as well. All I know is.. When I finally find Mr. Sanaa.. I'm going to interrogate him about why he took so long to come along, and why he's so bad at playing hide and seek. So Mr. Sanaa, if you are reading this, you better have some excellent answers ready for me. Also note that I am more forgiving when presented with Godiva chocolates.

And finally.. To all those afraid of change. It's a wonderfully mysterious and exhausting thing. If you have your arms open, it's usually a little less messy.

.. Oh and a song, of course.