Completely Incomplete

Empty souls, is what we are. It's been an ongoing realisation process for me to kind of see and find out how people are.. It's like we're all empty souls just walking around, and when we find something that fills a space, even if it's momentarily, we hold on to it so tight.. Just to make sure that part of you stays a bit complete.

Some people go through a large portion of their lives with no kind of partner to love. Others have them for a moment, and then they just pass by. Some have them for a lifetime but take it for granted, others have them for a lifetime and try to make the most of what they have. I don't really know where I fall in all of this.. I don't really know where my future is heading, or how it's going to shape out to be.

When I was much younger I used to think that my life would either lead into scenario A or B; Scenario A being the one where I get everything I want, but somehow find myself lonely. Scenario B being the one where I don't get everything I want, but somehow find myself feeling complete. For now I think I'm in between being complete and incomplete.

If I had a chance to change things I've done or not done, I would most definitely take the opportunity, not thinking twice and go right ahead and put things straight. But, realistically speaking how is any of that possible? You can't really live a "perfect" life. To be honest, I don't even think the word perfect exists. Everything I know about the world, or about people shows it to be imperfect. And that I guess is what is great about it all - like the people we love and care for, we love them because they have all these strange edges to them, all these completely insane and weird and perhaps even irritating qualities to them. And that is what makes a person.. Well, an individual.

I don't think a person can ever feel entirely complete. There's always something missing. At times you know what it is, and at others you have no clue. Though there are those odd days where you feel that nothing in the world can make you feel as great and "perfect" as the way you do then - but even those pass. I think it's completely impossible to be 100% satisfied with every single aspect of your life at any given point in your life. In my opinion, it doesn't exist. Don't get me wrong - I'm not saying that it's hard to be happy with your life, I'm just saying that it's just not possible to feel that everything is "complete". Those are two different things.

Meh.

We always want more. We always want things that are out of reach or in our eyes, are impossible to get to.

So here I stand, strangely incomplete and without a clue.